Balancing in sustainability
When I pause to think about my life, I find myself drawn to the things I want to change. The things I wish were different. The ways I wish I were different. How I could juggle the pieces of my life with greater ease, grace, and fluidity. Sometimes I catch myself saying “things will feel better when _____” or “I’ll be able to do ______ when _______”. The trap is that I don’t know, with certainty, that these statements will prove to be true. They are stories I’ve created. Projections. Hypotheses. Thieves that steal me away from my present. What’s true? My current default is focusing on the things in my life I’d like to change and, in doing so, bypasses the myriad of things to celebrate. The things I want to protect. The things I want to sustain.
Several steps come to mind as I reflect on sustainability (for both the parts I want to maintain and the change I’d like to pursue).
Know yourself. While awareness may sound like an obvious or simple “step 1”, I have found it requires constant practice. To remind myself where to start. And keep starting. To bring ourselves back to consciousness from the places in our lives we may be running on autopilot. Are you awake? Are you actively listening to what you want and need or are you “uh huh-ing” yourself to hurry to whatever is pulling your focus at this moment? Consider the components of your life you’d like to sustain as they are… as well as the areas in your life that could use a shift in balance. What are you merely tolerating? What is important to be a part of your days? How much weight does each part hold? What parts do you put in your bag so you can carry it without wanting to set it down? Juuuust enough weight so it will strengthen you without exhausting you. Remind yourself there is a difference in how much you can carry and how much you want/need to in order to move gracefully.
Set the goal. How do you practice awareness of what you need to achieve the goals for your life? How do you want to feel in your day-to-day life? Run with me for a moment. How fast/slow is your pace? Does changing your cadence help with conserving energy? What elements along your path insist that you change course? How do you react? Are you feeling strong on this run and would thrive at a sprint? Or maybe you’re on your marathon’s 20th mile and feel like you’d be better suited at a mere shuffle (like you could probably walk faster) to just. keep. running. Setting a goal for sustainability helps to determine how much time/energy/intensity to apply. This helps to focus effort intentionally.
Examine expectations. We are in constant forward motion, whether it’s slow as molasses or zipping around. The question to ponder is how do we want to move forward? How do we expect to cope with the pace we’ve set? For how long? How flexible can we be when we hit a road bump? How much control do we have of our vehicle? The more awake we are to the expectations we have around a change or habit (realistic or otherwise), the more proactive we are in preparing to sustain it (or adjust the equation so it is more likely to be sustainable). Contrary to popular demand these days, we can’t operate at a 10/10 all the time. Are we listening and caring for ourselves when we realize we’ve reached an 11? Can we catch ourselves before we get there? I’m talking about when we start to smell smoke… and it’s not because we’re a “girl on fire” (what’s up, Alicia Keys).
Assess reliability. So how do we achieve sustainable change? The balance that is sustainability can only be achieved with awareness: of self, of want, and of need. It can also only be achieved by telling the truth: both to ourselves and to others. How am I really doing with my current juggling act? Is this a responsibility/change I want to/can shoulder while keeping the rest of the pieces of my life in peaceful flow? By making this change, am I acting in line with my goals and values? What are the things I want/need to prioritize in my life right now?
In summary, consider the following in how to maintain a flow already in motion, or to create sustainable change:
Know yourself. What is my balance between sprinting and moving at a glacial pace? In what instances would I love the sprint? When would I appreciate the shuffle?
Set the goal. Is the goal to crush a deadline at work? Is it to parent kids who grow up one day to be self-assured, content, kind human beings? Your allocation of time, energy, and flexibility depends on the goal.
Examine expectations. What are my expectations of myself? Of my environment? How much of this is within my control? What do I need to do intentionally? Is the grass really greener? If so, why?
Assess reliability. This helps to bring intention to our balancing act. Is what I’m doing repeatable? Can I recreate this experiment with the same success (tomorrow? In a week/month/year?)? If not, what is true about my inconsistency? When I find myself resisting, what is the root of it? What is the value of it? Is it that this goal is not important enough to me? Is it irrelevant to my greater goal/vision? Is something else a priority right now? Is the truth something I can make peace with?
As we progress through life, we practice, we evolve. We balance, we wobble, we fall. We get up and practice some more. We are never meant to have it all figured out. The more we practice, the more we learn, the more intentional we can become.
Instigating change is challenging. Promoting sustainable change is even more challenging. Coaching is impactful in guiding awareness, clarifying goals, and supporting accountability. Don’t hesitate to reach out if you’d like to learn more! Here to guide you.
